Friday, July 17, 2009

Your call is important to us

.
What those hold messages should say:


Welcome to Company XYZ, a public utility and monopoly. We tell you your call is important to us, but it really isn't at all. However, you have to stay on line because you really have no choice. It's not like you can change service providers.

You can hang up, since we'll cut your service regardless, but you might as well stay on line to plead your case. Eventually. When we're back from break. Maybe. If we have nothing better to do. Besides, our staff is totally alienated from working in tiny cubicles with a noise level that's through the roof at a job so incredibly boring it boggles the mind. They simply cannot be expected to care anymore - if they ever did.

If our customer service rep got laid last night you might be in luck. If not you're screwed because he/she wasn't.

Have a nice day.
.

17 comments:

Jill said...

You know, I don't even think mice could be happy in such a place.

geewits said...

So true! I sort of hate those people.

Susan English Mason said...

Here we get someone from another country who doesn't speak English and who I cannot understand. I spend the entire call after being on hold for an hour saying "what did you say? I don't understand."

Jocelyn said...

The only thing that keeps me in that game is the idea that these are people who really need their paychecks.

Hey, so, Poopsie: what movie were you and the Mr. watching that had him sobbing as your blackened heart looked on? I may need to watch it.

Gaelyn said...

I hate it. And it's an awful job. Guess somebody's got to do it. Not me.

Jazz said...

Jill - Yeah, really. They don't even have a wheel to run on.

Geewits - I do to, and sort of feel bad about it bacause poor them, they're just doing their jobs.

Pouty Lips - yeah, so do we. Come to think of it, this call centre looks like it's in India.

Joce - The film is Un homme et son pêché, it's a Quebec film taken from a book written I guess at the turn of the century by Claude Henri Grignon. A doomed love story, and a very good one at that. Oh, and it wasn't sobbing, it was more of a trickle... It might be subtitled, but I'm not sure whether you can get it in the US.

Gaelyn - I don't know how they do it. I'd go insane after a week.

Adele said...

I sort of feel sorry for the cubicle drones until I get one of the unhelpful ones, which is most of them. grrr. love ya Jazzer.

rachel said...

I detest making phone calls. Its a pain in the ass runabout that irritates me to no end. I feel that way because the only time I need to make phone calls is to call these exact same people. Utility companies, insurance companies, social services; all the call centers are all the same. And the line I hate most? "Your call is important to us."

*teethgrind*

Anonymous said...

I find the drones at the other end, if and when I actually reach a human being, are't too bad. They don't know anything and I can't understand a word they say, but the lilt in their voice makes me think they're happy to have the job. The company that operates this way, however, should suffer a horrible financial collapse with no chance of a bail out.

Mr. Jazz said...

What about those damn recorded messages with that pseudo-soothing voice telling you to chill while high-pitched voice "Hello-my-name-is-Becky-how-can-I-help-you-today" is doing her fucking nails...

Jazz said...

Hagelrat - Poor dear, they save the evil ones for you...

Rachel - don't grind your teeth over them, then you'll have to go to the dentist who'll give you all sorts of grief...

XUP - that picture freaks me out too. even the papers they have up in their cubicles are all the same colour...

Mr. Jazz - And if you have the patience, once Becky is done you have to listen to her annoying gratiing voice.

lime said...

ain't it the truth...

Warty Mammal said...

Ugh. I hate call centers.

You've reminded me of a husband-story. Years ago he had a call in to one of those places and the CSR kept telling him "Sorry, sir. We can't do that." He knew darned well they could, though.

Finally, he said "Are you looking at thus-and-such screen? Do you see a button on the upper righthand side that says ___?"

In a frightened tone of voice, the CSR said "How did you know that?"

"Never mind. Push that button. On the next screen that appears, enter the following."

Still somewhat freaked out, the CSR complied with his instructions. Satisfaction achieved, my husband ended the phone call. He never did bother to tell the CSR that he'd designed the software that their call center was using.

secret agent woman said...

I both dislike and pity those folks. That job would drive me out of my mind.

pierre l said...

Wow -- "un homme et son pêché" was a soap, possibly on the radio, when I lived in Montreal. It takes me back. I'll have to see if I can find the video now.

Jazz said...

Pierre - It's really a good version of the story, done by Charles Binamé with Pierre Lebeau Karine Vanasse, Roy Dupuis and pretty much every other actor in quebec it seems. here's the link on IMDB.com

and here on Cinéma Montréal

pierre l said...

An excellent recommendation; I have taken the plunge and ordered the DVD from Amazon.ca. The wonders of the Internet.