Monday, October 26, 2009

Damn, it's cold in Quebec...

I'm back.

Much to my dismay.

The picture post will have to wait - of course if you want pictures of Joshua Tree you can go here - the pictures aren't any different really from the last time we went. As for the other pics - honestly I just can't be bothered to spend the time getting a post together. Had you not been so prolific, forcing me to spend hours catching up on your stories, I might've made the effort.

Meh... probably not.

It's no fun starting the day at 39 degrees (Celsius) and arriving in Montreal still in the 30s - Farenheit this time. It freaking SNOWED the day we arrived!! That is just so wrong on so damn many levels I can't even begin to explain it if you don't understand. SNOW fer chrissake.... Someone shoot me now.

Things I've learned?

- I am made to live in the sunshine and heat. I was. I was born in the wrong country. If reincarnation does exist, I obviously was beyond evil in a previous life.

- It is patently unfair that Canadians like me are totally screwed in this regard. The warmest we can do is Vancouver where it rains 300 days a year. Yes it does Ian. It DOES!!!!! Americans have no idea how lucky they are to live in a country where they can actually go live in the warmth if they want.

- Hiking in the desert is beyond brilliant (Palm Canyon is an especial favourite)

- Hiking in the desert when it's 105 degrees and the sun is beating down on you mercilessly is highly overrated actually. Forget about hiking when it's 105 and there's no shade. At. All. Have a margarita instead. Or a chilled glass of Sauvignon Blanc by the pool.

- Sometimes a perfectly good hotel room seems like crap after nine days in a really cool, comfortable and extremely clean motel.

- Trader Joe's needs to open in Canada. In Montreal especially. Mr. Jazz and I could keep them afloat all on our own.

- You gotta love two days at the ocean after over a week in the desert. The contrast is loveley.

- It's 30 degrees (86F) in Palm Springs right now. It's hovering around freezing in Montreal. I rest my case.

- The 21st century has its good points - I've actually joined to the extent of getting an iPod (two actually, we got a nano and a classic, which holds all our music with space to spare - that sorta still boggles my mind - and the nano? it makes videos, has a stopwatch and a pedometer included... how useless and amusing is that. And for SO much cheaper than in Canada.

- PT Cruisers are - in my humble opinion - dumb excuses for cars. They're, like, girl cars. I hate PT Cruisers - but at least the one the rental place fobbed off on us wasn't white.

- What is the Californian (American?) obsession with trucks? Maybe not so much in LA, but as soon as you start going east, everyone has huge pickup trucks (I'm willing to give them sorta the benefit of the doubt as they might be work trucks - but probably not) or humongous SUVs - Escalades, Navigators, Hummers, Sequoias etc. Trucks made to go off road that will never ever see a dirt road, much less an off road track. I don't get it. Can someone explain this to me please?

- The Salton Sea is weird. Sorta creepy actually. More on that eventually.

- Redondo Beach, on the other hand is cool - cooler still is Hermosa beach, a half hour walk away.

- Like Geewits, I'm solar powered. And the fact that I'm back here does not make me happy. At all. Really. Not. At. All.

Now, I think I'll leave you, crawl into bed and moan listlessly for a time.



Rachel said...

The temperature here in CT is noticably dropping as I type, and I am entirely the opposite of thrilled.

I too have constantly wondered about the big truck obsession. But as a matter of fact, there is a cultural premium on "big things" which includes houses, appliances, electronics, and sex toys.

Also, yes, the Salton Sea is beyond creepy.

secret agent woman said...

It's because many Americans have bought into the idea that global climate change and the need for conservation are liberal myths and we have been blessed by God with the right to squander our resources.

BUT, "Americans have no idea how lucky they are to live in a country where they can actually go live in the warmth if they want." Um, yes, some of are extrememly grateful for that.

Gaelyn said...

Welcome home to the icebox of the continent. Love the desert warmth, but hiking in 105F is pure crazy. I thought the Salton Sea unique, sometimes a little stinky and full of flies. Many southern Californians just like things big, maybe because their state is big, or maybe because of small brains.
Have fun under all those covers.

Jocelyn said...

I know you're peeved to be back, but I'm all happy down here! I've missed you...but if you got Ipods and discovered Trader Joe's (in addition to all that other stuff of fun), then I guess your absence was worth it. I have to drive 3 hours to the nearest Trader Joe's, and, man, is it worth the trip.

So I'm sorry you're back. But not really.

Jazz said...

Rachel - Come to Canada, we'll get married, I'll move to the US and once my situation is regularized, we'll divorce, I'll marry Mr. Jazz again and import him to the states...

SAW - I'm glad some of you appreciate it!!!

Gaelyn - Yeah, the salton sea is definitely unique. There was no noise except the birds and it was just bizarre...

Joce - Oh, I've been a fan of TJ's for years and years. Every time I go to the states I search out the closest Trader Joe's. Of course, you realize, if I lived in a human friendly place like the CA desert (ok, it depends on your definition of friendly) I would blog from there...

Anonymous said...

I'm not a big fan of cold weather either, but I'm not at the point of abject despair that you are. If I were, however, I would get my ass out of this country and move somewhere warm so I wouldn't be miserable 9 months of the year. Go! Aside from jobs what's keeping you here? And jobs isn't an insurmountable obstacle if you put your mind to it.

ticknart said...

The general area around the Salton Sea is interesting, all laid out for neighborhoods and such, but the sea itself is disgusting and can stink up the area for miles and miles around. (I spent a month with my uncle in Calipatria one summer. Way too many stinky days.)

Suldog said...

Isn't Trader Joe's fantastic? We have a few in my area (Boston) and I often go there to pick up a few things. I don't do all of my grocery shopping there, but I do all of my GOOD grocery shopping there :-)

Guillaume said...

Funny, here it is borderline Indian summer.

Anonymous said...

Yes, you surely are my soul-sister in terms of climate at least. I revel in the warm delights you love. Oh, and I guess it is the west coast thing with the big mother trucks, because they are rampant here too. But, as my friend says, the bigger the truck, the smaller the dick on the dick driving it. Welcome home, my dear.

lime said...

yikes, i can see why going home woudl be a terribly rude shock to the system after enjoying warmth like that.

geewits said...

I felt terrible reading this after just coming in from sunning on the deck. I'm happy you are back to blog even if maybe I should not be happy you are home? I can't wait to read all about your adventures and see the pictures.

As for the trucks, I don't get the giant trucks and SUVs either but I have a little truck (a Ford Ranger) and I drive it for two reasons: 1) I like to sit up higher than a regular car so I can see what's ahead in flat Texas and 2) Being home improvement junkies we need to haul home the stuff we buy at Home Depot and Lowe's. And we never have to pay delivery fees for stuff like a washing machine. I don't know what I would have done without a truck when I was clearing out Mom's house. You also have an automatic patio if you drive someplace to watch fireworks.

Jeaux said...

So glad you're back... to your keyboard. But as winter hasn't yet started, I fear for your sanity.

"Have a margarita instead." It's amazing how often that phrase comes up in my internal monologue.

Jazz said...

XUP - Aside from jobs (and getting a green card to work in the states if you have no special talent they can't get there is no easy feat), is, among other things, family - aging parents who need care. A fact of life at our age.

Tick - I didn't really see the area other than the date plantations and such. It didn't smell too bad the day we were there, but seeing all the "dried and salted" fish lying on the shore I can imagine the stench sometimes.

Suldog - You have TJ in Boston? Boston is not that far from Montreal. I might just have to go visit you!

Guillaume - don't make me hate you!

Ian - As I heard somewhere before: The size of the truck is directly proportional to the guy's sexual insecurities.

Lime - it is indeed. Damn I hate the cold.

Geewits - after coming in from your sunny deck... damn..

Jeaux - Have a margarita.. now THAT sounds like a plan.

Susan Tuttle said...

Brrrr -- stay close to the fire:)

Warty Mammal said...

I'm catching up on previous posts. You gave me a smile with your observations.

Yes. Pickup trucks. Also, monstrous SUVs. What is it with those? When I lived in Texas, seemed like pickup trucks were the default vehicle. Back in the eighties, people even decked them out with lace curtains and such.

Here's a belated welcome home!