Friday, October 13, 2006

Bus drivers and denial

Something strange has been happening to Montreal bus drivers. It seems the toads with beer bellies have morphed into handsome princes. I’m not exactly sure when this happened, but damn, this morning on my way to work I ended up with two hot bus drivers. Hot young bus drivers. Seriously. Look, when a guy is hot enough to make me take a second look at 7:10 in the morning, he is definitely exceedingly sizzling.

Seems to me bus drivers were all the oldish guys with beer bellies, now they’re getting younger and younger. Hell, soon they’ll be plucking them right out of high school.

What? Whachoo sayin’ ? It’s not them getting younger it’s me getting older? I don’t think so… No, really, I’m not… Who, me? Denial?? Well, ok, um… Hot young bus drivers. OMG! Ewwww! Ewwww! Ewwww! I’ve turned into one of those dirty old men…um ladies… leering at the young ‘uns. Christ, someone shoot me now!


Speaking of denial…

DeNile, it has often been said, is not just a river in Egypt. I stand here before you and confirm that. Every year, towards the end of summer I’m struck by a huge dose of the stuff. Because me? I refuse to admit that summer has ended. It. Must. Go. On.

Forever.

But today, finally, I snapped out of it. No more sandals, no more flirty little skirts. The summer, she is gone. Vamoosed. Off to better climes. It was 4 degrees this morning (that’s 39 for those of you who haven’t joined the rest of the universe in metric). Yesterday it snowed in London (Ontario of course).

And to think it’s gonna get a helluva lot worse before it gets any better… Idiot explorers, you’d think they’d have had the wits to veer South.

Actually I’m sure the first people they met told ‘em, “Um, guys, you might want to take your asses South. You’re not gonna appreciate it here in the next few months.”

Of course the explorers (in our case, Jacques Cartier, a French dude, an obviously very suspicious French dude) must have said, “Ah, zey want us to leave! Zey must have somesing wort stealing”.

So they stayed.

And the rest, as they say is history.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

hey, I'm only 27 and I'm fully planning on becoming a dirty old lady:D

And that word verification thing... iuggggpx... What the fuck is that???

Jocelyn said...

You've got a serious case of Demi/Ashtonitis going on, I'd say. And hey, don't break yet--keep the flip-flops out for just one more week, won't ya? Actually, I'm impressed...you're further north than I, and I put mine away two weeks ago. There should be a Flip-Flop Almanac that tracks the yearly putting away times.

Jazz said...

Jocelyn - Demi/Ashtonitis.... ewwwwwwwwwwwww, the thought is shudder inducing. I'm not much od a Demi or Ashton fan

And for the record, I hadn't been weaing many flirty skirts recently.

Choochoo - You already are a dirty old lady. It's a question of attitude,not age. Oh, and by the way mvhggyx...