Monday, December 03, 2007

Puppy dogs and snow

I rarely speak of my job here. Because, I figure, what can be less intersting to the blogosphere than the petty world of my job.

But now something must be said.

I have inherited a puppy dog at work. Not a cute little lab pup. A new colleague. The one replacing the one who replaced my long time companion colleague who retired. She's a nice enough woman I suppose but she has this "a puppy so enthusiastic it keeps peeing on the floor" thing going. Metaphorically of course. I hope.

This is a good place, a really good place to work. I've been here 14 years and 90% of the time I really like it. So yeah, she's right about it's nice. But hell, it's nice, it's not the most extraordinary locale in the universe! That would be Paris or Bali.

So, 50 times a day I get : It's so great here, I love it, I'm never gonna leave...

Stay! fine, stay! But shut the fuck up about it already!!!

We know you love it now. A million times you've told us! Chill fer chrissake!

And yes, we know you're wonderful at organizing things. And you want to reorganize the whole place. The filing system, the library, the archives. Um. Dude, it's been organized for well on 35 years now. It works fine. If it ain't broke don't freaking fix it!

If she keeps this up, I just might have to shoot her.

Or thow her in front of the snow plows that are starting to pick up those 30+ cm of snow* we're getting today.

It finally dawned on me as I struggled through snowbanks that, um... nope, winter is not gonna just disappear this year. It never does. Le sigh

* To you Americans, you need only know 30 cm is a whole damn lot. I'm not gonna convert it for you.


Ian Lidster said...

God save us from the hyper-enthusiastic about 'anything.' I actually feel for you because I have had to deal with such individuals in the past.
We had a new newspaper writer one time who exulted in the fact that he was actually working for a real newspaper.
"I just want to write and write and write," he said, also peeing on the floor about it. "Now I can say I am a writer."
I looked at him, not unkindly and said: "You want to be a writer? Then you're in the wrong fucking place. Here you're a drone."

Ian Lidster said...

PS We got over 30 cm of snow on teh weekend here on the coast. That's not right.

Big Brother said...

Peeing on the floor, I can just see it in my mind's eye. Makes you want to smack her up along the head. I hate those enthusiastic newbies, it always brings out the Grinch in me. I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying something nasty that will pee on their parade. As for the snow I'll soon be able to go x-country skiing. ;o)

geewits said...

Only you could be creeped out by happy.

furiousBall said...

roll up a newspaper and smack her on the nose

Jocelyn said...

At the very least, make her go pee out in a snowbank.

We have plenty of those here right now.

About 30 cm worth, I'll bet.

Rhea said...

I admit it, I'm a dumb American. I don't know what 30 cm is, but I do know what overly enthusiastic co-workers are!!! aRARRGGHHH!

choochoo said...

Maybe her and the VI'll fall in love and they'll have kids and the kids'll all work there and you'll have tro train'em all. Hehehehehehe.

Jill said...

Oh dear lord. That sort of enthusiasm warrants execution. By manual strangulation.

ticknart said...

I bet the enthusiasm was encouraging the first two time you heard it. Too bad this new person had to keep going on about it.

By the end of the month she'll probably be singing a different tune.

Tai said...

Oh! My! God!
I LOVE this blog! This is the best post EVER!!!
I'm always going to read THIS blog. It's the BEST!!


Rachel said...

Aw, how charming!

30 cm of snow? Hmmm. We got ice. That was about it. I'd rather have snow.

Josie said...

Don't worry, Jazz, that youthful enthusiasm will wane, and she will become a crab like the rest of us. :-)

(Love Tai's comment. Heh)

Jazz said...

Ian - Nice to see I'm not the only one.

BB - when she really needs smacking I'll call you, you probably smack harder than I do.

Geewits - And that's why you love me so.

Furiousball - it seems that doesn't work with puppies. I wonder if it'd work with her.

Joce - You're one of those bizarre people who actually love winter, right?

Rhea - 15 inches give or take... And that is a perfectly chosen onomatopeia (if that's how it's spelled)

Chooch - bite your tongue!

Jill - Indeed. Indeed.

Tick - First time is nice, second time is awwwww. Third time is enough already. 156th is shut the fuck up!!!

Tai - Shaddap you evil wench

Rachel - I'd rather have sunshine and beaches

Josie - Problem is the enthusiasm ain't so youthful. She's 53!!!

Paul said...

I could keep the masses howling, or totally enthralled, or at least interested for minutes at a time -- with all the stories from my crazy line of work. My fear is that the very person I would blog about might might come across my blog and take the time to read it. Hey, it could happen!

So, for this reason alone, I dub thee brave, brave Jazz.

Having said this (and speaking of brave), when are you and PJ going to meet up to share stories about Corpus? :)


Gnightgirl said...

You have my complete sympathy. I once acquired a new employee that used to sing- and I mean SING - Good morning over the cubicle walls. When I'd mumble "mmm-nin" she'd sing "oh, c'mon, we can do better than that!!

I wanted to rip out her throat.

kimber the wolfgrrrl said...

I've always found that people who are obscenely enthusiastic normally have something to hide... And if anyone ever dared to touch my library & archives, no matter how damn happy they are, I'd punch out their larynx.

Jazz said...

Paul - I'd say the chances of her coming across my blog are about 539,572 to 1. So I'm taking my chances. Yeah, I know, P and I should get together... the time, it flies.... *sigh*

Gnightgirl - Oh god, I'd HAVE to kill her. Luckily mine seems to be calimng down a little.

Kimber - I'll keep that in mind. As for the library, it's not as if it were an interesting one, so i don't much mind.