Monday, March 10, 2008

I got no title

I have pictures of the storm up at the cottage. In my camera. At home. Thus my post of today is sort of screwed up.

I'll try to do it this week.

Suffice it to say, if this keeps up, I'm going to have to kill myself. But I'll have to get creative because thowing myself off the balcony won't cut it. I'd fall on too much snow.

So, instead of a picture post, how about lets talk politics, mmmkay?Pauline Marois, head of the Parti Québecois*, or at any rate her "people-who-think-up-the-bright-ideas", has come up with a new and different concept.

OK, first off, Pauline isn't too big on the separation thing right now. She wants to be premier and thus does not want to go into an election campaign preaching sovereinty and another referendum. At any one time there are probably about 40% of people in Quebec who want to separate. Not 40% die-hard separatists, but people who would be willing to go for it if it came up. That's simply not enough.

Life is good in Quebec right now so a lot of people figure what's the point.

So, new concept? Pauline is plugging a "National Conversation" where we can all sit down and talk about our feelings about separation, about our identity as Quebecers about how wonderful being a country would be, I suppose. A National Conversation to reach some sort of consensus I imagine.

I like Pauline, but this has got to be one of the most ridiculous ideas in recent political history. It sounds like Mommy sitting the kids down for a time out. Gimme a break. You can nationally conversate me to death, personally I don't see the point to separating.

One thing's for sure, I wouldn't like to be in her shoes, what with the Parti Québecois' nasty little habit of washing its dirty laundry in public and ex party leaders bitching in the media about what the current boss is doing. It's actually quite cringe inducing. Though it makes for good copy in the papers, no doubt. C'mon people, you're all adults, professors, lawyers and the like, stop acting like adolescents in a schoolyard.

I have to admit it has been good for a laugh, at any rate. The media have been having a field day. Well, at least until this weekend's storm. Since then they've been talking snow...

Then you have the other buffoon, Mario Dumont. He's the boss of the Action Démocratique, the Quebec "Right". Though really, in Quebec, whether you're to the right or left there really isn't much of a difference.
So yeah, Mario. As an aside, honestly, the guy creeps me out. Look at him and tell me he's not a creepy sonofabitch. Looks like some sort of pod person... But I digress.

A big thing these days in Quebec is how French is spoken less and less. Well, in Montreal at least. I'm not sure if you go to Rouyn-Noranda, Chicoutimi or even Quebec city, you'll be hearing much of the dreaded evil English.

Montreal, of course, attracts most of the immigrants so obviously French will be spoken less here. Is that so hard to understand?

Now Mario, he thinks we're letting waaaaaaaay too many immigrants into Quebec. Thing is you see, Quebecers have stopped churning out dozens of babies per family; immigration fills the gap and makes for some damn fine cuisine besides.

Mario's solution to cutting immigration and saving French in one fell swoop?

A natality policy. So Quebecers start making babies and shit.

'Cause everyone knows that people have babies for political reasons, to save the language. C'mon, admit it, all of you who had children did so to save your language eh?

Someone needs to sit down with Mario and have a national conversation with him.

French will survive in Quebec if Quebecers want it to survive. I think they do.

And I also think that not speaking English in Quebec, when you're surrounded by millions of anglos is economic suicide. And that Quebec becoming a country would change nothing at all to that fact. There are 7 million of us. There are 300+ million of you. Do the math. And if French has survived until now, I'm thinking chances are it will continue to survive.

But what the hell do I know, I'm not a politician...

*the separatist party in Quebec


furiousBall said...

All they have to do is just put loudspeakers around Quebec and pump some Bryan Adams through the streets. Anyone who is not Canadian will leave immediately.

A Happy Downtowner said...

I think a lot of Quebecers are suffering from "separation fatigue". It would be nice if they had it overnight without going through the motions. They want to protect their language but then the country is bilingual so...

The way I see it, if they decided to indeed go with that stupid plan, is that people will either say "enough, if I hear one more word about it, I'll hurl!" or they will say "yes! let's do it!" And you know what? It wouldn't surprise me if the rest of Canada was to say go ahead, do it. We're also suffering from fatigue. This issue will never go away.

I agree, Mario needs to have his blinders taken out. Happy times indeed! lol

Rachel said...

If I ever needed proof that Canadians are loons, well, I know where to find it.


Seriously, make more babies? How would he enforce that? Bedroom police? mandatory invitro fertilization?

what the hell?
is French really that great of a language? I mean, seriously...

*wink, j/k*

citizen of the world said...

French is a wonderful language and babies are magical, but for God's sake. A) the world is already over-populated and B) that's an inane poicy that wouldn't even work.

Ev said...

I have the solution to your problems: import French immigrants! They'll already speak the language, they'll keep the population up, and you won't have to crank out so many children. The only real problem I can see is getting the French people on board with the plan.

Maybe they can just send their children?

Ian Lidster said...

I am happy you're not a politician. That is just one of the reasons why I love you. But,regarding language, people get too bent out of shape about such things. Look at the Welsh speakers. There are only about 11 of them, but they continue to speak a language that is undecipherable to anybody else in the known universe, but it hasn't died out.

Big Brother said...

Hey lil sister, you are being discriminatory... you forgot the last of the three stooges... Curly. You have Larry (Mario, big and dumb), Moe (Pauline, small and shrill) and finally Curly (Charest). He even has the hair. Their discussions pretty much sound like a Three Stooges film, and show about the same kind of mature, insightful dialogue...;op

Josie said...

Ah, yes, what would Canada do without Quebec? If they did separate, we would have no one to amuse us.

I agree with Happy Downtowner, a lot of Quebecers are suffering from separation fatigue, but so is the rest of Canada.

We love Quebec, and we want Quebec to stay in Canada, so we just sort of sigh and roll our eyes whenever we hear of the goings-on there. Quebec will never separate.

geewits said...

As a closet anthropologist, I get sad when any language disappears. I'm curious why the French have to work so hard at keeping their language, though. It's also a big deal in France. It seems to me there will always be French because of cuisine, ballet and art. It would probably be better if everyone just spoke Latin. Those silly Romans shouldn't have p!$$#@ so many people off.

Jazz said...

Furiousball - You pump Brian Adams through the streets, I'll leave immediately too.

HD - yep, separation fatigue. I don't agree however that the country is bilingual, on paper perhaps, but not in reality. Any more than Quebec is bilingual.

Rachel - Of course we're loons. Why do you think we have one on our dollar, aka the loonie. We were probably infected by the US as far as looniness is concerned. As for the incentive to have kids, I think they're going more along the lines of financial incentives.

Citizen - Actually a few years ago, they tried the incentive thing. $1000 for your first kid, $2000 for the second... of course that doesn't even cover the cost of diapers. Needless to say, it didn't work.

Ev - Actually Quebec does have some measure of control over its immigrants. French speaking immigrants are given priority. For instance, if you're from France and you get it in your head that you'd really like to live through our nasty winters you're pretty much guaranteed a spot at the top of the list.

Ian - Damn, I'm glad I'm not a politician either!
It's one reason why I love me too!

BB - I didn't forget him, I was just all stooged out.

Josie - That's Quebec for you, the street clown of Canada.

Geewits - Thing is French isn't about to disappear. But the French (and Quebecers) make a big deal about it because we luuuuuuuurve us our drama.