Sunday, March 30, 2008

Travel Haiku

Thirty sleepless hours
Some baggage lost in transit
I'm too old for this

Three hundred humans
In a flimsy metal tube
I'm glad it's so safe.....

Things you think about after travelling almost 30 hours:

  • How bizarre that we think it totally normal to be hurtling through the air along with 300 others at 35,000 feet and 800 km/h in a metal tube...
  • "In the unlikely event of a landing over water", taking the brace position and knowing that your life vest is under your seat is really no help since falling into water from 30,000 feet will pretty much be like slamming into a brick wall at 800km/hr. Why not actually be honest about it?
  • Economy passengers should NOT have to walk past the executive class passengers in their little pods with seats that lie down flat. Unless of course I got a standby seat in executive. Then I just don't care*. I'll even toast those in the cattle car with my glass of champagne. Because otherwise, having to see how the other half lives when you're embarking on a 15 hour flight is just cruel and unusual punishment.
  • Whoever said "familiarity breeds contempt" probably spent hours cooped up with other people on a long long flight.
  • Turning right into the far lane freaks me right the hell out, seeing that logically it should get me killed by oncoming traffic. There is something inherently wrong about right side driving. So very very wrong.
  • Lucky we didn't have to rent a car on arrival
  • Seeing parrots fly around an roost in the tree right in front of you is really strange.
  • Plastic bills are really cool.
  • Vegemite is not. I still haven't found a reason for its existence, despite Mr. Jazz's love of the stuff.

How cool is it that C has internet at home? I'll be talking to y'all!

PS: they found our luggage, we'll have it tonight, YAY!

*Of course I care. If you made Executive, do you really want to have to look into the eyes of the rabble?


Anonymous said...

Glad you made it there
to the far side of the world
tired, but in one piece.

They lost my luggage on the way to Australia, too. Hope you have a great time.

(SOmehow I was thinking we were travelling abroad at teh same time, but I was a month off.)

Jocelyn said...

OOh, this is so exciting...especially now that the flight is over and the luggage found. Jet lag and no knickers is the very definition of suck.

Vegemite? Nope. Can't get my head or mouth around it.

Keep having fun!

geewits said...

Hey Jazz,
I'm so glad your friend has the internet. I was hoping maybe you'd find an internet cafe or something. 3 weeks is too long. I hope you get your luggage intact and get over your flimsy metal tube lag soon. But of course, you are a seasoned world traveler. Keep in touch and have lots of fun!!

Big Brother said...

Just a problem lil sister, a lot of the world drives on that side and you soon get used to it. When we spent all those weeks in the UK and Ireland we soon got used to it. As funny as it may seem even today when we take a round about (rondpoint) it always seems that we are going around the wrong way, we were so used to the round abouts in the UK. Have a good trip... and take care.
PS I have figures out that the life vest thing is just to keep you busy before you hit the wall...

furiousBall said...

That guy with the googly eyes in Men at Work liked Vegemite too.

Dumdad said...

In Australia - I'm jealous. I was there in 1992 for six weeks and loved it. Where are you or are you touring?

Vegemite is a poor relation to Marmite...

Susan Tuttle said...

Now that is a lot of travel - wowzers!!

Great haiku - I can feel your pain.


Ian Lidster said...

Glad you got your luggage. Thanks for the preview of the trip we hope to take next year. But, I do want to travel executive class and I want the trip to be only half as long -- OK?
So nice to hear you got there safe and sound.

Jazz said...

Citizen - So losing luggage on the way to Australia is just the regular routine... hmmm. Where are you going?

Jocelyn - Ah, but I had the foresight of putting half of each of our stuff in each suitcase. Plus some underwear and a day's worth of clothes in carry on. It was all thought out. Maybe that's why it got lost.

Geewits - surprisingly, I don't feel jet lagged. When we got here Sunday, I forced myself to stay awake until 10:30, went to bed and woke up after a good night's sleep. Go figure.

BB - I don't care if a goodly part of the world drives wrong. It's wrong. Period. Especially when I've been awake 30 hours.

Fuball - It's an Aussie (and Mr. Jazz) thing I guess.

Dumdad - We're in and around Melbourne and Dromana. Seeing friends we hadn't seen for years more than touring. And isn't Marmite just Vegemite with carrots and onions in it?

Susan - It's a long ways away, but worth all the pain.

Ian - OK, fine, I'll try to have it arranged with Air Canada to have the planes fly faster when you go. Of course, you already do lop 5 and a half hours of the trip by living in BC.

ticknart said...

Does Mr. Jazz like peanut butter? I have a theory that people who don't like peanut butter like Vegemite, and those of us who like peanut butter are sane.

A Happy Downtowner said...

I'm glad to read you made it ok, I was thinking of you two. Vacation is great, travelling there is the pits sometimes. I hate airports, planes, being squished, taking too long... but I enjoy being there. Have fun!

Think September :)

Hageltoast said...

lol, I always get really excited about flying and want to drop through the clouds. Always wonder about the safety announcements tho' I reckon if a plane goes down sticking my head between my legs just means i'll go splat in a really undignified position.

Cedar said...

I always got really nervous when flying across the country and the Flight attendent would say, "In the unlikely event of an emergency water landing, your seat will become a floatation device." Yeah, right off that seems pretty damn unlikely to me all the away around.