Saturday, May 16, 2009

A Weekend Meme...

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1. Where did you take your profile picture?

Darlings, it was taken by that oh so popular Vogue photographer way back... Wotsisname, Richard Avedon...

Look at me, such elegance, such style

2.What exactly are you wearing right now?


My usual loverly green skin and tophat. My trusty walking stick is at my side (Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gaaaal).

3.What is your current problem?

Keeping my skin damp in this dry dry office.

4. What makes you happy most?

A nice pond full of juicy bugs to eat, and should that not read "most happy"?

5. What’s the name of the song that you’re listening to?

Hello My Baby - (1899) Words by Joseph E. Howard - Music by Ida Emerson

6. Any celeb you would marry?

Kermit maybe, but he's so damn full of himself sometimes. Not easy being green indeed. Pffft. Lightweight. And all this "Kermit the Frog reporting from Snow White's castle" stuff. He was never a journalist. You know they wrote all his questions for him beforehand; he never did an interview by himself in his life! And Miss Piggy? That was all for show. Marketing. She was actually having this torrid affair with Krusty the Klown of Simpsons fame. The thing they had going?!?! It was intense. Kermit was way too stick in the mud for Miss P.

Oops, sorta lost track there... So marriage to a celebrity? No. Marriage to celebrities is highly overrated. Believe me we're just as pathetic and screwed up as the rest of you. Maybe more.

7. Name someone with the same birthday as you?

I am unique. No one has the same anything as I.

8. Ever sang in front of a large audience?

Naw, when that guy in the documentary tried to make money off me by having me sing for an audience I just sat there and made him look like an utter fool. Singing frog indeed! Exploitation it was. Had he given me a fair share of the take, we could've made a deal. But noooooooo, it was all for him, me I just got a dryed out fly once in a while. I showed him!

9. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?

I've been compared to Kermit (him again!!!), but what the hell do they know, he's a guy fer chrissake! And my cousin Juliette, the model for Arrogant Frog. Yes, that's Juliette, my Parisian cousin. She has a great place just by the Seine. She likes the masculine look now and then. The contrast with her femininity... Whoa. You should see her in stilettos and a tight dress. Her legs go on forever!


10. Do you still watch kiddie movies or kiddie TV shows?

I watch my film now and again, the single most popular Loony Toon evah (and only documentary, as mentioned in Q8): One Froggy Evening. Personally I don't think it's kiddie fare.

11. Do you speak any languages?

What a stupid question.You're just asking that because I'm a frog, eh? Doesn't everyone speak some sort of language? Obviously, as I type, you see I speak English, as well as French and Ribbit. With a smattering of Spanish and a touch of German and a smidge of Russian. Sort of .

12. Has anyone you’ve been really close with passed away?

My life is a horror story in that regard. For instance evil children forced my cousin Vinnie to smoke until he exploded. Poor Vinnie, they should've forced scotch down his throat instead. They wouldn't even have had to force him. He was quite a drinker but he never got the hang of smoking.

And my cousin Frank? Squashed flat by a car. That's happened to lots of us in the family. And they have the gall to use his picture as a stock photo!!! No respect. We get no respect!!!

Frank after the accident

Frank just before the accident. He was a looker he was

13.Do you ever watch MTV?


MTV, Schmemtv. Booooooooooooooring.

14.What’s something that really annoys you?

Those fish who sometimes get to the bugs before I do. Annoying life forms they are. Can't even breathe out of water. Lightweights.

Oh, and people who ask if I'm Kermit. I look nothing like him. He's a guy, I told you that!!! And why does everyone assume that Michigan J. Frog is a guy's name. Really. Oh. The top hat??? People, I'm just an eccentric, that's all.

See? I look nothing like him. He looks like a kid's toy. No class, no style. Hmmph.
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13 comments:

VioletSky said...

Are you any relation to the frogs of 'Frog & Firkin'? Because I had lunch there once and it wasn't very good.

furiousBall said...

did you know that just like women, frogs don't fart?

Gaelyn said...

A ribbiting interview. Learned so much about you. Keep on hoping.

raino said...

i am laughing my arse off. really. that was funny!

citizen of the world said...

I've always loved that singing frog.

Saw some way cool poisonous frogs in Costa Rica with red bodies and blue legs. Our lodge owner called them blue jean frogs. Could be kin of yours?

david mcmahon said...

In rhyming slang, ``frog and toad'' is ``road'' !!!

Susan Tuttle said...

you are so silly -- thanks for my morning laugh and croak.:)

Jeaux said...

For what it's worth, I have never, ever, thought that frog legs taste like chicken.

mrwriteon said...

Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal. Send me a kiss by wire, honey my heart's on fire.

My favorite frog and favorite cartoon in the known universe. Hooray for you.

Jocelyn said...

That squashed photo hurts me.

Stop.

Jazz said...

Violet - Not really, unless you count the fact that they're my second cousin Charlene's sister-in-law's brother's third cousin's second cousin. Despite our loose definition of family, I think, no, we're not related.

Furball - obviously we don't fart. However, I had no idea women didn't fart.

Joce - Imagine how Frank felt.
Gaelyn - hop hop hop

Raino - Glad you laughed.

Citizen - Actually cousin Shirley is married to a blue jeans guy.

David - Splat.

Susan - My pleasure dear.

Jeaux - No they don't and I'd rather not think of that thank you very much.

Ian - It is a documentary dear. All about my life. So there.

SSQuo said...

Dont you speak Croak???

Jazz said...

SSQuo - Only at home. Welcome to my blog.